Usually, I would publish something like this on my other blog, but I’m not reviewing it from a fannish perspective; I’m reviewing it from a personal one.
About a week ago, I had some time and nothing to really fill it with. As is my way, I fell into the YouTube rabbit hole, this time with one of my favorite human beings, Ben Fankhauser. I was deep in, and I knew Ben had worked and been a part of a short film called “Twentysomething.” I had been wanting to watch it for a long time, but couldn’t find it anywhere in its entirety. So, I just waited. I guess my patience paid off.
I googled the film and found the full-length version on Vimeo (thanks Vimeo!) and immediately clicked play. What followed was an approximately 30-minute reminder that being twentysomething is okay, and it’s okay to not have it all figured out.
The film centers around Sam Cooper, a 22-year-old who dropped out of college for seemingly no reason. The film takes place over the course of the day of her 22nd birthday, and it happens to be the same day as the Patek Comet. She wants to see it so she can be a part of history. Throughout the film, Sam is listening to motivational tapes on a Walkman or something of the like, and she seems to be totally confused about what to do with her life.
The reason that this 30-minute film spoke to me so much is that I felt like I was watching me. While Sam and I don’t have much in common, I see myself in her. I just turned 22, I live with my mom, and while I am not a college drop out, I’ve been bouncing around schools for the last four and a half years. I feel like Sam and I are kindred spirits in a lot of ways and seeing her journey from the beginning to the end of the film, makes me feel a little better about my own journey.
I’ve been told that I come from a family of late bloomers. I don’t quite know how to feel about that, but I do know that I’ve slowly come to acceptance of that fact over the last many months. I’m okay with the fact that I might have to wait a little longer to see my own success. I also know that my NVLD is a part of who I am, and I’ve accepted that. I’m happy with where my life is headed, but I still worry about the fact that I might never achieve or do anything with my life and that scares the crap out of me.
“Twentysomething” reminded me that I don’t have to achieve anything to be happy. I can be happy and it doesn’t need to be through what I have or what I’ve achieved. Sam reminded me that my life doesn’t need to be perfect. I can live at home, work a job, and just live my life without worrying about others opinions or anyone else’s expectations of me.
Much love, and remember to #LoveLouder.